Slowly making progress.

I am working on a manuscript about how to be psychic. It's actually a combination workbook and instruction manual. I didn't get much done on it last week. Today, however, I got about 3k words written and finished the second chapter. If I can manage to get myself caught up to about where I wanted to be for my total word count by the end of the week, I will be pleased. The target word count per day is 1.5k. I figure if I manage to do 3k everyday this week, I should get myself caught up just in time for the kids to go on break and throw a monkey wrench into my word count.

It's ok, however, because I'm planning to write at night during those days. My blogging may become more choppy but I don't expect that to be a terrible problem. As long as I make a point of posting at least one paragraph, I will be pleased. That blanket I've been working on has just been sitting off to the side over the last several days. Rather then writing when the kids are on break, I will be doing spinning and crochet.

I figure between that and my writing, I should have enough stuff to keep me out of trouble for a little while. I keep telling myself that today is the first day of the rest of my life. If I keep an optimistic face forward, the rest will fall in line, right?

I love my children...

I love my children but they are just driving me crazy at the moment. Anyone who tells you that toddlers are easy to deal with is lying to you. Seriously, they are. How can I say this? Because my 2 1/2 year old son is a sweet child that is out to make me pull my hair out. He has thrown the largest temper tantrums recently and I'm not sure if it's because he's teething, suffering from cabin fever (because the weather hasn't been exactly kind to us going outside recently), or if he's just been in a perverse mood. Either way, I find myself wondering what on earth I was thinking when I so desperately wished for children because I had no clue what so ever how difficult this was going to be.

And my friends and family members with older children tell me it only gets better. Is this a good type of better or the sarcastic kind, because I'm kind of dreading this. Ah well, at least the baby is napping and Cuddle-Bear has stopped screaming to play with his hair brush. Granted, it's a bit annoying that he's decided to brush the baby gate with it, but you know what, he's not doing any harm so I'm not going to reprimand him for it. Annoying is better then ear-splitting shrieks any day of the week.

Ah toddlers and their imaginations...

So, I asked Cuddle-Bear what he wanted for dinner. His answer was : Buttons! My solution - ritz crackers sandwiches with cream cheese in the middle, vanilla wafer cookies with peach puree in the middle, and freeze dried apple bits. He appears to be really enjoying it. :)

Update (1 of 2)

I realized that I've been painfully neglectful of this and the other blogs that I have. This is something that I mean to correct in the near to immediate future. My life has been rather crazy of late. Part of this is all my own damn fault, I admit and own that fact. I also have to say that part of this is because I'm still struggling with depression. A whole lot has happened since I last posted.

Hmm... Where do I begin? I suppose I should list the major highlights of the past several months. Since my last post was in June (JUNE!?! Wow! Have I been neglectful or what!?!), I should probably start with the big events of July, the biggest being the birth of the baby! We learned from my husband's employer that the economy is creating some problems for his business. I suppose it was a matter of time. It was floated about the possibility that my husband and everybody else who worked there would have to take two weeks furlough unpaid. To say the least, no one was pleased but no one was very surprised. They got a few big contracts in and things began to go more smoothly (or so it seemed) for the remainder of the month.

We had a quick visit from Beloved's girlfriend. It was really nice to see her. She's such a sweet-heart. She and I didn't get to visit as much as either of us liked, but there's a reason for that. Near the end of her visit, I started false labor. Yes, you read that right, false labor. Everybody planned around the due date and we all assumed that things would go relatively like it did with Cuddle Bear. The delivery was scheduled a week before the due date and her visit was scheduled for a week before delivery. You'd figure that meant that we'd have everything work out well, right? Oh, we were such fools. Babies don't like to wait for anything scheduled, even their arrival. Yep, he came almost a full week early and was born at the end of July. July 29th, to be precise. Labor wasn't half as long as it was with his big brother. I hope to be posting a picture or two of the baby and I, as well as both the boys together.

August was an incredibly busy month. Not only was I recovering from the cesarian section delivery of Snuggle Bug (and my goodness does that nickname fit him well!) but we had the fun of Cuddle Bear's second birthday, my parent's-in-law's wedding anniversary, and drama surrounding the resolving of the estate of my husband's late paternal grandmother. All year, we had been hearing that my husband's parents were going to be renewing their wedding vows for their 50th wedding anniversary this year. This is what Beloved's sister had been telling us and desperately trying to get us to assist in planning.

She was most disappointed when I explained that we couldn't exactly help between getting ready for the move at the end of May and getting ready for the baby. We then didn't hear anything for a few months. We assumed that plans were continuing and thus prepaired things so that we and the children were ready for such a gathering. (I had made the cutest little matching pair of light sweaters for both the boys because August evenings up here get chilly quick, even.) This, however, did not prove the case when a surprise visit from my husband's uncle (the namesake of our first born) happened.

A very casual barbecue at the parents-in-law's house happened with my husband's siblings and their family in attendance. I almost wrote families, but had to remind myself that my sister-in-law and her beau are not engaged. I have a feeling they will be soon, because things are getting quite serious between them. It really was a shame that he wasn't able to make it, but grad school had just started then and he's going to school out of state. (She tells me that this semester is going really well for him, which I think is fantastic! She also thinks that he will be able to make it up for Christmas, which will be very nice. He's a sweet guy and I like him.)

Cuddle Bear had a ball running around with his cousins. The girls cooed at Snuggle Bug and then got bored with him, thus decided that his big brother was more fun. It was cute to watch him and my brother-in-law's eldest playing cars with the Barbie (or Barbie knock offs, I'm not sure which) vehicles. It was especially amusing when the youngest tried to tell Cuddle Bear that Barbies were for girls to play with. He just ignored her and then proceeded to start playing with the little animals that were part of the Barbie playset they had brought. Everyone got a good chuckle.

Cuddle Bear's birthday did not go as I had wanted it to. I had wanted to have another party for him. No one thought to offer any assistance with it. There was just the expectation that there was going to be a party and people asking when it was. Well... That's not exactly fair of me to say. My husband's side of the family didn't demand to know when Cuddle Bear's party was. They just invaded the day before his birthday with an arm load of presents. Thank the gods that the house was relatively clean and that I actually had the motivation to get myself and the children dressed for the day. (I spent most of August exhausted because Snuggle Bug had colic. Colic is another word for nocturnal hell, by the way.)

To say the least, I was more then a little upset but doing my best to hide it when my grandparents came to visit on Cuddle Bear's birthday. I felt horrible about not having a cake for Cuddle Bear but it was far too hot that day to bake one. I at least attempted and somewhat succeeded to have a little bit of a theme for the very small at home party (which had the surprise guests of my grandparents). I made Cuddle Bear train shaped rice cripsy treats with yellow chocolate windows and red m&m wheels. While Cuddle Bear had fun playing with the treats, he only ate the m&ms. Fortunately, Cuddle Bear's excitement over his toys turned the day around considerably for me.

His favorite new toy was his tow truck. He paraded around the room holding it up over his head and excitedly cried out "Tow truck!" over and over again. Before that, he was about to have people read him the story book that his paternal grandmother gave him a dozen times (The Very Hungry Caterpillar). The toy tow truck, however, completely trumped that. I think it was excellent that we planned it so that it was 'from' his little brother. Cuddle Bear actually has tottled up to Snuggle Bug and kissed him on the cheek for the tow truck several times now.

In early August, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression. Between the fact that the doctor put me on Lexapro (which did wonders for me, because it was getting kinda scary for a little while) and Snuggle Bug's problems latching on, we stopped with the breast feeding and dragged out the small army of bottles. Things improved significantly with feedings at that point because I wasn't in excruciating pain and Snuggle Bug was having an easier time getting nourishment. I didn't bother trying to pump or express anything for him because of the medication. Amusingly enough, Snuggle Bug is growing faster then I think Cuddle Bear did and a part of me is questioning if it's because he's been on formula.

During the time that Beloved was taking care of me as I was recovering from the delivery, he was on unpaid furlough. We were both irritated but didn't think too much of it because we were warned about this. Instead of the two weeks for me to recover that we thought it was going to be, however, it was closer to a month. I over exerted myself and pulled a few stitches which resulted in another additional week of not being able to pick up anything heavier then the baby. That was when our finances started to get interesting and, I'll admit it, I started to get really angry with my husband's employer.

What We Did Today 3/2/09

First, a bit of rambling mouth noise that can be disregarded if so desired. The last week has been insane and I think I'd prefer it if things like my morning sickness just didn't rear their ugly heads again. It's not so much that I've been too busy to post as it is that I've been too disorganized and scattered to do so. My PTSD has been making life hell and I absolutely fucking HATE it.

Ok, ranting/rambling done! On to what the boy and I did today!

This morning was an odd morning for us. Breakfast was fairly quiet, as usual. The boy doesn't get very excited over breakfast unless it's pancakes. I'll be making some in the near future, but we don't have them very often. So, pancakes = treat. Once breakfast was done, he got to play on the floor with his cars and I think I almost tripped and killed myself on them three or four times walking thru the room. Thank the gods that we don't have Matchbox cars everywhere! I'd surely have been dead six times over then.

After the playing with cars happened to the sound of the morning news show, the TV got turned off and he began playing with his music playing toys as I read some e-mails and news stories on the Internet. He then decided that he wanted to cuddle. So, he sat on my lap while I looked at a few webcomics, which he was fairly bored with except for Questionable Content. He seemed to really enjoy the coloring that was done for that one because he kept pointing at the green shirt/jacket that the character of Martin was wearing.

We then went away from the computer and looked out the window. The wind was blowing pretty good today and making the trees in back sway. The boy kept pointing out the window at them with a huge smile on his face. We sat on the couch and read his board book If I Had A Little Train. I think we read that three times before he decided he wanted to get down off the couch.

So, off the couch went the little boy and this was about when I started feeling absolutely exhausted for no reason. Oddly enough, this was also around when the boy started his fussy because he's tired business that happens sometimes when he misses a nap or goes down for it late. The odd thing was this happened at around 10:30 in the morning, almost two hours before it usually happened. So, we went up stairs for what I thought was going to be a little nap.

I was wrong. We slept for a while. It was around 3 in the afternoon when we got up. I'm rather confused by this because as far as I know, everybody (my husband, son, and I) slept well last night. Either way, when nap time was done, we had a late lunch. I just have to say, my son's love of sandwiches makes lunch time so easy! He was delighted with his ham sandwiches and crackers. I was impressed by the fact that he drank three cups of milk.

I think we'll be dealing with a growth spurt soon because his appetite has increased recently. I know we're going to be dealing with teething. In addition to him drooling like a faucet has been turned on inside that little mouth, he has now started trying to chew on everything and he has diaper rash. I think it's another molar coming in but I could be wrong.

This afternoon, he drove his little remote control car around the floor. It was actually very cute because he made a point of walking over to me where I was sitting on the couch to point at his car spinning around in circles as he pushed the button. I have to say, Lady_Cinnibar, you are a genius and this was probably one of the best Christmas gifts he's gotten so far.

We had a little meltdown when it was time for the car to get put away but by then it was time for the news. When the weather man came on, it was all good. The boy decided he wanted to cuddle some more and made a point of putting his cheek against my belly. I think he can feel the baby squirming around inside. As I felt the baby move, my son cuddled closer to me and put his hand on my belly.

It was a sweet and special moment... up until the baby inside kicked my bladder and my toddler son pushed against my bladder as he stood up. A part of me almost wondered if there was some kind of psychic exchange between them to plan that. Was it a conspiracy to make me really need to run to the bathroom? And if so, why did my son throw his usual screaming tantrum when I went upstairs to do so?

Dinner time went well and when his father got home, he had a good time watching Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune as I finished up dinner for my husband and I. I think he prefers 'Wheel' because of the colors on their wheel, but that's just my suspicion.

What the boy & I did today: 2/24/09

I've decided to start posting what my son and I do on a daily basis. It will help me to update this on a more regular basis and I think it'll serve to bring a little amusement to folks around too. So, here is the first installment.

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The morning was a bit busy from the word 'go'. The boy was up at the crack of dawn and playing in his crib with his toys. Usually, I get him and bring him down for breakfast at 8:30. Today, because I was up at 6:30, I went and got him shortly after he was up. So breakfast was an hour early today. He absolutely enjoyed the bananas we had this morning and completely ignored his cereal 'O's.

He played on the floor with his stuffed dog toy that sings and his big blue fuzzy bear while I finished up some writing in my journal. When I was done, we read a few stories. He has several favorites but right now the one that is top of his list for when we're downstairs is 'Bumpy Tractor'. Most days we alternate between that one and the other in the box set, 'Speedy Firetruck' but for the last three days now he has been all about 'Bumpy Tractor'.

I hope that he decides to go back to alternating between his favorites because I'm starting to have dreams about reading that story! At least they're not nightmares of the endless 'Speedy Firetruck'. That was a result of reading it at least a dozen times over one week! I was ready to go hide that thing!

After reading 'Bumpy Tractor' two times and reading a second hand copy of 'If I had a Little Train', we listened to the news on the TV and to the boy's 'Spin 'n' Grin Snail' play Camptown Races. The boy was rather entertained by the weather man giving his report of what we should expect over the next few days. I don't claim to understand it, but the boy will stop what he is doing and just stare at the TV when ever some one is giving a weather report. I think he gets it from my side of the family. After all, I have a grandfather, a father, an uncle, and two brothers who watch the Weather Channel constantly.

I turned off the TV before I got out the coloring book and his big crayons. We sat on the floor with my lap desk and first he watched as I colored a picture of a ship. Then he and I worked together on a picture of art supplies, with him picking the colors I used and finally coloring some himself. He colored some on a picture of a tractor with an apple tree. This was after I had colored in the apples on the tree purple because he pointed at them and handed me the purple crayon.

When it was time to pick up for the morning snack... Well, we had a melt down. The boy wanted to keep his crayons and we had to put them away. I'm glad that he didn't try to crawl away with the three he had in his hands. That could have made things a bit difficult. Instead, he just sat and fussed at me. Once I put his snack in front of him, however, all fussing stopped. It's amazing what a few cookies and a cup of juice will do. :)

Then came the barrage of songs. I sing alot with my son. He can't quite manage to sing but he'll coo at me or babble along with the songs at times. He has started to do what he can for the hand gestures to accompany 'Itsy Bitsy Spider'. He's been doing his best to keep up with 'Baby Bumble Bee' and '5 Little Ducks.' A bout a day or so ago, the boy has started to point at his head at the beginning of 'Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes' and he started to clap to 'If You're Happy and You Know It.'

I'll post up a list of lyrics for these in case anyone reading this doesn't know what I'm talking about. I'll also note the hand gestures. My young neices absolutely love it when I do these songs with them too. :) I suppose working at a daycare did me some good after all. :)

The boy started to fuss and rub his eyes a little bit at about 11. So, I asked him if he wanted a nap. Usually, nap time is about 12:30 or 1 pm (right after lunch). I wasn't horribly surprised when he said yes in answer to my question. So, he went down for a nap and I did too. I woke up almost an hour before him. My little man slept for a long nap today! He fell asleep at about 11:15 and woke up at almost 2:30 in the afternoon (when he usually wakes up from his nap).

Lunch time went well. He ate up his sandwich and didn't really pull it apart too much. I was surprised, actually, how well he did with his lunch. I figured he was going to play with it some but he didn't. He poked at his fruit a little before eating it but on the whole he ate very, very well. I'm hoping this good behavior streak with his food is going to carry on into dinner tonight.

After lunch, we played with blocks some and then played with his trucks. I'm proud of the boy because he stacked one block on top of the other on purpose a few times this afternoon. We piled up the blocks, using his trucks. Instead of the expected temper-tantrum when I started to put the blocks away, he sat down in the corner with all of his books and started 'reading'. This means pulling out all of his downstairs board books and sitting in the middle of the pile as he looks at the pictures.

I then began composing this entry as the boy has been playing independently with various stuffed toys and noise making toys. He is fussing a little now, but I think part of it is because his sippy cup was out of reach until just a moment ago and it is starting to get towards dinner time. We're also close to the evening fussing because Daddy is not home from work yet.

As I sit here and think about this entry, I'm debating possibly posting up the 'menu' that we do each day. I'm sure some folks would freak out over some of the stuff I feed the boy, but he does good with it and generally enjoys it considerably. The pediatrician has no complaints either, beyond the fact that he thinks we started him a little to early on solid food. When the child is smacking his lips and screaming because he is not getting any of your sandwhich, that's a rather impossible to ignore sign that the child is probably ready for the infant cereal. No harm has come from it, so we're not worried over it.