roses

roses

Friday, November 30, 2012

Novel Excerpt

Armand fixed Johnathan with a penetrating gaze. “You are in pain. We must get Penelope to bring you your medication,” he said. Armand pushed away from the table and walked down the hall. Johnathan stared woodenly at the table attempting to take in the magnitude of the last month's worth of events. It boggled his mind how he could have gone from overjoyed at his plot with Margaret to reunite with Vivian to how he found him sitting in Louis Abril's house with Armand Pariseau as master of the household and Louis buried somewhere on the property.

Still caught in contemplation, Johnathan absentmindedly noted Armand's return with Penny by his side. Penny took out of her pocket an amber colored bottle. She shook a few pills into the palm of her hand and offered them to Johnathan. He picked up one of them and held it up in front of himself. He muttered quietly, “To sleep, perchance to dream. Aye, there's the rub, for in that sleep of death, what dreams may come, when we have shuffled off this mortal coil, must give us pause.”

“If you must quote Shakespeare at your medication, must it be so maudlin?” Armand said lightly, “The world's mine oyster. A far superior quote,” Armand chided. Johnathan gave him an annoyed look.

“The words of a buffoon...” Johnathan stared when Armand cut him off.

“Are more welcome during a time of trial then those of a prophet of doom,” he retorted, “Take your medication. Then we are bundling you off to bed with your lovely maiden. And this sweet creature shall ensure bold Andrew's rest.” Armand looked over at the rifle in his hand. Johnathan was half expecting him to make some sort of comment about it being an uncivilized weapon. Instead, he looked at it with a critical eye. “It was good that this was not needed today. It needs cleaned,” Armand said.

He thrust the rifle into Penny's hands as Johnathan took the pills. As he was swallowing down another mouthful of coffee, Armand returned with a cloth and a gun cleaning kit. With all the care of a surgeon preparing for his trade, Armand laid the cloth out and readied his supplies. Gingerly, as though taking a newborn, Armand took the weapon from Penny. As he began the task of disassembling the firearm, he looked closely at the various parts.

“Louis, Louis, Louis,” he muttered in disappointment. Armand was half way through cleaning the weapon when Andrew and Granville returned. He absorbed in his work, he ignored the arrival of the two men. Granville set the keys down on the table and walked back into the kitchen. There he sat down with his wife.
Andrew looked at Armand as he was cleaning the gun. “Penny said that the scope was off,” Andrew said. Armand nodded. Andrew looked over at Johnathan, who was glaring bleary eyed into his almost empty coffee cup. The medication had taken the edge off of his wits and left his thoughts just disjointed enough that he could not adequately express the utter disgust and disappointment he felt with the situation. Johnathan wanted to rage but he found he simply had no energy left for it. “You look exhausted,” Andrew said quietly.
Johnathan looked up at him. “I suppose I am,” he said, “If anything, we must check on Vivian.” Johnathan stood and started towards the front stairwell. He paused and looked over at Armand. “What is the plan if some one decides to come looking for us here?” he asked.

“They will simply have to discuss the matter with Louis,” Armand said, not looking up from his work. Andrew frowned but said nothing. The two men walked to the foot of the stairs. Andrew started to go up the steps behind Johnathan when he waved him off. Andrew watched as his master made his way up the stairs. Once satisfied that the man wasn't going to tumble to the ground, Andrew went off in search of something to eat. He hated to admit it, but stress had a terrible habit of making him hungry.

Thursday, November 08, 2012

NaBloPoMo # 8

I'm so proud of myself. Today I broke the 4k writing mark in total words written for the day. I'm sitting over here doing a happy dance. I also learned something important today, burning 4 sticks of incense, no matter how nice it smells, does not agree with my lungs. It also fails to cover up the wretched smell that is in the entryway. Seriously, it smells like something died out there but neither I or Beloved can figure out what the source of the stench is. I am displeased.

Wednesday, November 07, 2012

NaBloPoMo # 6

Well, it's my birthday. My gift to myself was meeting my writing goal for today. I added two thousand words to my manuscript. I've a fair amount of housework that has been languishing but that can be dealt with easily. If I can manage it, I'm going to squeeze in more writing time tonight. I am two days ahead of schedule. I am going to see if I can make it three by the time I head to bed tonight.

Monday, November 05, 2012

NaBloPoMo # 5

I don't think I wrote anything in here yesterday. It's been a wacky day here. I fell about sixty words short of my writing goal for NaNoWriMo today. I am not upset, however, because I finally moved through the land of 'how the hell does this fit my plot?' It is my hope that despite the running around I need to do tomorrow, that I will get a good amount written. As the characters reveal themselves to me, I am finding myself unexpectedly charmed by some of them. The character of Andrew is proving to be delightful. What was going to just be a bit of proverbial eye candy has proven to have greater depth then I expected. It makes me hope to see more interesting bits develop as I work on this.

(Edited to Add: Apparently I did write in here, I just forgot about it. LOL)

Saturday, November 03, 2012

Excerpt from this year's NaNoWriMo novel

“I saw god,” he said, “There was no heavenly choir or pearly gates, like my mother said there'd be. There was an old man dressed in BDUs holding a rifle with a bayonet fixed. Looked almost like our old gunnery Sargent, actually. He had one eye, the other was a bloody mess. He had no insignia of rank or anything. He pointed at me with his freehand and said 'report to Midgard, maggot.' Next thing I know, I'm laying on the ground coughing up blood.”

NaBloPoMo #3

I'm highly annoyed that the candle plate I have sitting on my altar cracked. I will need to safely clean up the broken glass after the incense burner is done. In the meantime, I'm just going to sit here and be irritated. A part of me says that I should have realized that the glass wasn't going to handle the temperature of the incense burner. Another part of me says that I couldn't have know for certain that it would have handled it. All I know is that the next time I decide that I'm going to burn incense in this fashion, I am putting the clay trivet under it. I know that can handle higher temperatures.

Friday, November 02, 2012

NaBloPoMo #2

I slept a good chunk of the day away this morning. I didn't sleep well last night. For some reason, I was having nightmares of the boys freaking out over us having a pet cow. I think it's just some addled nonsense that my brain came up with. Aside from having that nightmare a few times, I dreamed that I was writing. As I was writing, my words turned to utter gibberish. The then began deleting themselves when I paused to drink my cup of coffee. I think this is a manifestation of my fear that this year's manuscript is going to be utter garbage. I am pretty sure that fear was part of the reason why I was having a hard time writing this afternoon.

Thursday, November 01, 2012

NaNoWriMo & NaBloPoMo

I'm participating in both. This is my first entry for NaBloPoMo. I'm pleased with the fact that thus far today, I've got almost 3 k words in on the manuscript. I'm hoping to add to it this evening after the kids go to bed. My goal is to try to average three to four thousand words a day. I will be milking my days free of children for as much writing time as I can swing. I am also going to be making an effort to get my three journaling pages done before I sit down to type here at the computer.

In other news, I have gotten more yule gifts for people. I am absolutely certian that one of my neices is going to go SQUEEEE over what I'm giving her. :)

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

It's that time of year!

NaNoWriMo starts tomorrow. I am picking up a project from a little bit back (the fetish novel) and working on it this year. I have decided that it doesn't matter if I'm technically 'cheating' at NaNoWriMo this year. I am just going to work until the manuscript is finished. I am also going to attempt to do NaBloPoMo this year as well. The blog entries are going to be short but I am going to make a concentrated effort to get more disciplined in my blog posting.

This is in addition to the journaling that has been a bit hit or miss over the last two weeks. I want to try to get myself back into the swing of doing serious writing. Over the last several weeks/months, I have been struggling to get things down on paper. My bouts of depression have been robbing me of my voice. I am going to do my best to push through this and get serious about this again. I have four different manuscripts languishing. This really needs to be corrected.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

A stable mood...

I'd really like to have one for a little while. Today's mixed episode SUCKS. I've been swinging back and forth between depressed, cranky, and 'normal' all day. As the day has worn on, I've been trending more towards the depressed and cranky end of things. This is bullshit. I just came out of a depressive episode. I don't want to go into another fucking one. Seriously, what the hell?

Took the plunge...

I just mailed out a submission package for my children's manuscript. We'll see what comes of this. In the meantime, I've got other stuff to type up and edit before publication. I hope I remember where I put my notebooks of poetry.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Stumbling forward.

I've been having a rough week or so. It started with Snuggle Bug getting sick the weekend before last. He recovered and Beloved and I thought that everything was fine. Two days later, Cuddle Bear gets sick. We keep him home from school and then I come down with the bloody thing. That was a long and miserable day. I am beyond thankful that Beloved took the day off from work to mind us. Snuggle Bug, was, of course, feeling perfectly fine and a ball of energy.

Cuddle Bear seemed to have improved and gotten over the bug by the time the next morning rolled around. Later in the afternoon, we get a call from the school nurse. He apparently has been crying, complaining of an upset tummy, and had a fever. So, with some help from Beloved's parents, I went and picked him up. Then came the four day weekend.

That started with a great deal of fanfare and excitement. Beloved's parents brought the boys a bunkbed set. I tried to help my FiL in assembling the bed but he refused all help. (If I had any questions where Beloved got his stubborn streak, they've been clearly answered now.) The boys were thrilled beyond belief that they had new beds. They are still very excited about them and it has been almost a week now that they have had them.

As a thank you to Beloved's parents, I made homemade pizza. The kids, both fully recovered from their illness, were again excited to be having homemade pizza. When their aunt showed up for dinner too, they were bouncing around the room like pinballs in a machine. Somehow we managed to get them settled down and off to bed. Then, after the guests left, Beloved took off to the airport to meet his girlfriend.

She managed to get lucky and find some time to fly out to visit. I kinda wish that I had the opportunity to visit with her some as well, but I recognize that her time was at something of a premium. She may be coming out again in a few months. I hope that I get to have the opportunity to sit and have a cup of tea with her. She's a really sweet lady and I'd like to get to know her better. I recognize, however, that part of what I need to do is get past my shyness and actually initiate a conversation or two as well.

So, that was the weekend. While Beloved was out entertaining his gal, the boys were off the wall crazy. Monday they were such a handful that I was ready to scream. The crochet snood that I had been working on for one of my online sisters got destroyed by the kids while I was in the bathroom. They ripped out 85% of my work. This was something I had been working on over the last few months.

Now the crochet hooks are missing. I have no idea how I'm going to get this thing done. I confess, I've been in a bit of a panic to find everything. Because I have yule gifts that I am going to be making by way of crochet. It has not been easy to keep my cool. I look at the snarled remains of that snood and I get so down right sad. That's ok, I have thread and if I have to, I will go buy another hook. Now that I have figured out the pattern, I can get to work on it and get it done.

I have slid down into a depressive episode and that's been making things difficult. I am writing this with some sense of trepidation. I feel very anxious that this blog entry is just going to bring nothing but criticism. My home is a mess because I haven't had the energy to stay on top of the cleaning. I have been feeling physically unwell. I think part of the problem is the depressive episode and part of the problem is that I started my menses. The cramping has been horrible. Thank goodness I've got raspberry tea and tylenol. I am just going to keep putting one foot in front of the other. I'll get through this one day at a time.

I keep telling myself "Baby steps. FlyLady's right, this didn't happen all at once, I don't need to fix it all right now."

Thursday, October 04, 2012

Yule list.

I've gotten the hat that I promised Beloved's brother done. It is, I fear, a size too small. So, I am going to make it again, a size larger. I figure I can give the smaller hat to someone else.

I have started work on a hat for Rocker Chick. It isn't coming out quite as I anticipated but I think it is because the variegation in the pink yarn is of a shorter length then I expected. It still looks quite nice and I am sure that the hat will be well liked. The nit-picky part of my brain says that it doesn't look right. I am actively telling it to hush.

I have a pair of books for Energizer Girl. I am going to make her a filet crochet bookmark as well.

I am at a bit of a loss for what to make for Energizer Girl's sisters. I need to talk with their mother about that.

Trouble 1 and 2, I think, are going to get a joint gift. I want to do something nice that they can both enjoy. But I don't think hats would go over very well.

Danger Duo have me stumped. I need to talk to their mother for ideas. Fortunately, I've got a few months until Yule.

I am at an utter loss for what to make for Beloved. The hat I made him last year has been sitting in a safe place where the kids don't run around the house with it. I suspect if I make him another hat, it'll have the same reception.

Cuddle Bear and Snuggle Bug are going to be getting amigurumi cars or trains, I haven't decided yet. But I think they'll love the idea of a plushy toy they can take to bed with them.

Monday, October 01, 2012

Publication? Me?

I'm getting exhorted to publish from several different directions. I'm currently freaking out a little bit over this. I have been having people I don't even know now telling me to get my work published. Apparently my Anam Cara has set into motion a chain of events that seems to be conspiring to having me write adult fiction. This is what happens when you decided to randomly write something for someone in the hopes of helping make life a little less boring. It WILL take on a life of it's own.

A part of me is screaming that the genie needs to go back into the bottle.

I am, however, only going to focus on my writing. I'll let the rest of it settle out as it will.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

The Saga of the Landlord & the Apartment

So, almost two months ago, our landlord died. We expressed our condolences to the family and figured that the estate getting settled would be the extent of the drama we'd have to deal with. We were sorely mistaken. Two days after the landlord died, the building inspector and the health department showed up to look over the downstairs apartments.

That was when things went sideways. The building inspector looked over conditions down there and condemned the apartments. Between black mold, rotted floors, and a burst sewage line, it was something of a no brainer, I suppose. The neighbors downstairs were given 48 hours to get out. Thus, they went through a marathon of packing and moving as the health department found them a place to stay for a week. I had heard something about the possiblity of the whole building being condemned and I became concerned.

A few phone calls later, I am assured that it was only the two apartments. At about this time, the rent check for August was due. So, I was talking with the handyman who has been doing work for the landlord (and is still doing so for the widow) and I asked if he had spoken to the widow. He answers that he had and explained that we were to write our rent check out to the real estate business that the landlord had run. Previously, we had been writing the check out to the landloard personally. So, we do so and continue on as though it is no big deal.

After some discussion between Beloved and I, we decided that we should start looking into a new place to move to if they weren't going to start work on repairing the downstairs apartments in the immediate future. As I did my bit of investigation as to what was going on with the apartments below, it became clear that while the claim is that they will be repairing it in the immediate future, there appears to be no intention to do so. Thus, I have begun searching for our next place to live.

And then last week a new layer of bullshit was piled on. The widow sent the handyman over with the check we had written for the rent in an envelope, uncancelled. Mind you, this check is made out to the real estate business, like the previous month's check, which was accepted and deposited no problem. The widow was looking for us to reissue the check in her name. Now, we currently have a lease that was signed by the landlord personally. We currently have no lease. I was concerned and suspicious when I was asked to reissue the check.

I asked why the check we had written wasn't good enough. I was then told that everything with this property and the business was tied up in the estate, which is currently being settled. I contacted Beloved once this was brought to my attention, entirely unsure what the correct thing to do would be. Beloved told me to hold on to the check and that he'd handle the matter. Then the handyman returned and asked if I was going to hand him a check or mail it.

I told him that we were going to handle matters by mail. This happened last Thursday. Then, Friday night, I smelled hot electrics coming up from the vent. After a quick bit of investigation, the possibility that it was originating in our apartment was ruled out. Thus, I called the widow (as I did not have the correct number for the handyman) and informed her of the situation after I spoke briefly with Beloved. She asked me to mail the check. I told her that Beloved was going to be contacting her regarding the matter by mail.

I then was most insistent that someone come and investigate what was the cause of the scent of hot electrics. The widow calls the handyman and then calls me back, telling me that he will arrive in a 1/2 hour. (The location he was driving from is 15 min away, when the weather is bad and road conditions are awful. Beloved was not pleased when informed of this. He had me turn off the main breakers for the apartments downstairs as we waited for the handyman to show up.) When the handyman arrives, he speaks with Beloved and the matter of the check is brought up again.

Then yesterday, the handyman is here doing something and he pokes his head in, asking about the check yet again. He tells me that the widow is willing to accept a check written out to her deceased husband and that she is willing to write up a new lease for us with her name on it (something which he said when he spoke to my husband that she couldn't do). I am doing my best not to get anxious over this matter. Beloved tells me that we needn't worry about them trying to boot us out. I am working very hard not to get upset over this but this repeated badgering is grating on me.

Meanwhile, I am discovering that it is quite challenging to find a two bedroom apartment in our price range in the school district. I have started going to view apartments and I am striving not to get to caught up in anxiety over that as well. Beloved and I have decided that if we can't find someplace to move into by the end of next month that we're going to wait until spring to move. My gut tells me that we need to find somewhere to move to by the end of October. I don't know how much of this is intuition and how much is anxiety.

But, that is the saga of the landlord and the apartment, as it stands now. I think this counts as venting. Or at least, I sincerely hope so.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Hey, look at that, I have a blog!

It's been a wild week. Last Tuesday, the boys started school. Things have been going full bore ever since 7:30 am last Tuesday morning. There was the excitement of starting school (which the boys have decided is awesome); the fun of spending the weekend with their aunt and cousins (and the new kittens!), and the thrill of another week at school. I'm really hoping that we can keep at least a smidgen of this excitement when a few months have gone by. It'd really suck if the boys decided that once the novelty has worn off that school sucks.

In other news, I have finally heard the full song and I have decided that this is awesome.

Sunday, September 09, 2012

Relish and pickles? Yes, please!

I have been enjoying the process of making lacto-fermented pickles. I really am getting a kick out of how easy it is. I'm still fidgeting with the recipe to get them just right. My last batch of dill cucumber pickles came out well but I realized the boys and Beloved won't eat them. Snuggle Bug's bus driver, however, LOVES pickles and has decided that my homemade ones are the best she's ever had. So I gave the jar to her with instructions to give it back to me when they're gone.

I am trying out making zucchini pickles. I put them in the brine with several cloves of garlic. I expect this to be very tasty because Beloved and I both really enjoy garlic. (I got a STEAL on garlic the other day. I bought a sandwich baggie FULL of peeled garlic cloves for just $1.30!) I am going to get a few more cucumbers, another small zucchini, and a few other things to make some relish.

I am really interested in this recipe. I also want to try my hand at making salsa. I have been looking up directions on how to do small batch canning and I am seriously looking at just what it is that we will eat around here. I think it would be really awesome if I possibly got a few batches of soup put up, some other items that we would use in the winter, and some tasty condiments that I could possibly give away at Yule. It is going to take a little bit of planning to make that happen, I suspect.

Wednesday, September 05, 2012

First day of school!

The boys were excited this morning. Snuggle Bug practically ran to his bus when it arrived. Cuddle Bear was impatient for his bus and we watched, watched, and watched for it. It was running almost an hour late. When it did show up, we ran for it but the bus stopped long enough to honk before driving off. Beloved's mother, the glorious woman she is, came over and loaned me her car. (A short conversation with transportation for the school got the bus situation figured out for tomorrow, thank goodness.)

Thus, we arrived at the school just in time for the other kindergarten kids and their parents to be making their way to their classrooms. It was a delightful surprise to find that Cuddle Bear's teacher is the same woman who happened to have taught Beloved and I in 4th grade. He was quite charmed with her and quite excited to be there. I must confess, it surprised me to no end to learn that Mrs. Smith was still teaching and at this different school district no less. (She confided in me when we were chatting on the side after Cuddle Bear's testing a little while back that she is beginning to think about retirement, but absolutely loves teaching so much she's reluctant to do it.)

The boys both had half days. They're napping right now. I think the excitement just wore them right out. Now I'm tempted to start doing cleaning, though another part of me says I should take this break while I have it.

Rocker Chick started school yesterday. She says that it went well and it was good to see her friends. I'm really hoping that things continue on a good note for her. I'm thinking that I may want to surprise her with something in a few weeks to help keep her spirits up. Who says that you have to wait until a kid's in college to send them care packages! She's expressed some interest in a few subjects that I happen to have books about kicking around here. So I'll be sending them to her soon. It may help make the more boring classes tolerable to have those books to look forward to later in the day.

It looks like my other nieces are starting school later this week. Again, I hope that they all get off to a good start. I think I am going to do something special for them in a few weeks too. I am thinking about crocheting them bookmarks or something else nifty. I am fast with a hook and I don't have EVERYTHING packed right now. I can't believe that it'll be time to start working on Yule stuff in earnest. Where did the time go?

Tuesday, September 04, 2012

Chutney Chili

1 8 oz jar of Major Grey's Chutney (I like the Patak's brand.)
3 16 oz cans of red kidney beans
1 lb beef, browned and drained
1 rib of celery, diced
1 sm onion, diced (opt)
5 cloves of garlic, diced
1 sm bell pepper, diced
1/2 pt of stewed tomatoes, chopped

When you brown the beef, that's a good time to cook the onion if you want to make it less potent and it's also a good option to saute the garlic then too. It helps mellow the flavor.

In your crockpot, combine all of the above and mix. Cook on low for 24 hours, stirring at the 8 hr mark and adding water as necessary.

Your chili will be thick enough to stand a spoon up in it. This is what you want. :)

Saturday, September 01, 2012

Preserving foods the 'old' way?

I am starting to get tomatoes off my plants. I am looking at a decent sized batch. As such, I have started planning what I will be doing with them. I don't have what I need to do much in the way of canning, though I must confess, I am more then a little bit in love with the process of making lacto-fermented foods. It is incredibly easy!

My beet kvass isn't quite perfect but it has had a noticeable effect my my gut. I am far less prone to terrible bouts of gas and I am finding that my cravings for sugar have dropped markedly. I am trying to include more healthful foods into my diet (and possibly sneak it into the kids diet as well). As I eat (and drink) more probiotic foods, I am finding that my appetite is not as unpredictable.

It is actually working to make it more regular. I figure if I keep this up and continue to do more 'real' foods, I may actually be able to get a good start on losing this extra weight. I'm finding that I have more energy, even on my depressed days, since I made this small diet change. So, I have been busy reading and researching more recipes and ways to preserve what I am harvesting (and splurging on at the store).

I finally found a recipe that makes a small batch of lacto-fermented salsa. I am going to run out to the store tomorrow some time and in the course of picking up more pull ups (which I completely forgot about), I am going to get the missing ingredients for this salsa. I may even pick up more small pickling cucumbers and make up another batch of them. Pretty much everyone who has tried the cucumbers has liked them (with the exception of Cuddle Bear and Snuggle Bug, who are suspicious of anything not PB&J).

If I manage to get some more peaches, I'll probably be making this to keep by as well. Because I love to use a little bit of chutney in my chili recipe. I am considering promising to make my Mother in Law some of this chutney and a batch of pickles in exchange for helping me get the produce to use. The funny thing is, I feel like I'm finally doing what I should have been doing for years, putting up food for use later.

I'm still perfecting my technique but I'm really happy how things are coming out so far. The idea that I could use heritage recipes and heritage varieties of produce to make the same kind of condiments that my great-grandmothers did... it thrills me.