Wednesday, January 06, 2016

It just rolls on.

I keep telling myself that today will be the day that I will get everything I wanted to do done. Then little things like a migraine or medication brain fog get in the way. I am trying to not be discouraged but it is kinda hard. I thought I'd be jumping back to my previously aggressive posting schedule and it just hasn't happened. I feel tired and discouraged.

I don't know if it is just because I'm having a hard time recovering after the break or what exactly it is. I want a vacation. I want to go somewhere warm, where I have no responsibilities. That, however, is not going to happen anytime soon. I feel burned out and that is disheartening. I am looking around trying to find some way to not feel so burned out but I am coming up with nothing. I can't just let all the housework sit and ignore the work of managing the kids for a day.

The weekends are chaotic and exhausting for me. I can't relax because there is so much going on. I try to get some time to relax and rest during the week but by the time I feel like I'm ready to start getting things done, the kids are coming home from school and I have to mind them. I wish there was a way to get some alone time with my husband. I wish there was a way to get some time where we don't have to worry about when we woke up in the morning (and now what to do if the kids get up before us).

I'm so tired and so ... sad. I am sad that I feel like this. A part of me says that I should be up and on the go right now. But I am literally resisting the urge to take a nap because the kids' bus will be here in a few minutes.

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