untitled no. ??^n+1

 I'm not sure where to begin. Technically, today has been a typical to good Monday. The tarot decks that I ordered arrived ridiculously early. I got about half of my chore list done. I made around $20 reading cards this afternoon and the kids were reasonably well behaved.

My brain, however, is not at a great place. I now know that the problem over the last year wasn't me but the fact that my glucometer was over 2 years old. Apparently the things last for a year to two years at best. I have adjusted my diet back to what it was at the beginning of last year. My A1C might bump up a few tenths of a point because of that. Or, it may stay where it is, I don't know. But the doctor was dismayed and disturbed that I had curtailed my diet as severely as I did. He assured me that I didn't need to do so and all but ordered me to go back to the initial diet I was prescribed.

He also prescribed a new meter. He was surprised (and perhaps embarrassed) that he hadn't prescribed one to me to begin with three years ago. I still have the old meter. I am using it because it's sort of working (it is off somewhere between 10 and 20 points high) as a stop gap measure until all the testing supplies are here. The weather today was such that I didn't want Beloved driving over the hill to the next town over to get prescriptions (when not everything was ready) in the middle of a windstorm.

The winds were enough that they blew over the kids' play house and then blew it apart in the lawn. It's been screaming around the corners of the building and making an eerie sound. It snowed a little bit but the winds have been whipping so hard that it didn't really settle on the yard. There's a bit of drifting up against the tree line along the property line to the east of us but not much.

I started today out feeling alright enough. But as the day has progressed, my mood has been dropping. I think it is no small coincidence that I am due to start my menses anytime this week. I had the beginnings of a migraine but I narrowly avoided it through a liberal application of caffeine and naps in the morning. That, however, threw off my schedule for the day and left me in a bad headspace for the rest of the day.

I still have a half dozen books to port over to KDP. I still have a manuscript to finish editing. I thought I was going to get that done last week but it didn't happen. Because I was so anxious over the appointment I had on Friday. The anticlimactic quality of the end results of the appointment should have been a source of relief, but my anxiety brain is still spinning. I am mightily vexed.