I will have to walk into the maelstrom to get things, oiy.

 My last week has been spent on knitting feverishly on this sweater. (40 rows before the final edging.) I haven't even started the bear that's been requested of me. I'm starting to think I might not get it done at all. I'm crocheting just as feverishly on a mobius cowl. I think I made a mistake thinking it was going to be easy to get done quick. Large yarn and large hook is faster than small yarn with a small hook. But 200 stitches per round is still alot. And I worry it won't be large enough or wide enough with the yarn that I have. 

I was planning on baking cookies from scratch but now I think the best decision is to buy packaged dough and go that way because I'm running out of time. I think the school pictures (that initially I thought weren't going to happen) showed up. That means picture frames and such. Aside from going into Shopmageddon to buy picture frames, I need to acquire things for the 12 boxes of Yule. I also need to locate books for the holiday eve book giving that I've started doing. And there are people that I can't  make things for because the pattern I was testing had the gauge all messed up. I don't have time to fix that and then make three versions of that pattern. So, I will have to brave the crowds to get stuff for them.

As a person with social phobia, Shopmageddon is not my favorite time of year. As a matter of fact, it is my least favorite time of year between the crowds and all of the canned holiday music that hasn't changed since 1950. I loathe Bing Crosby's voice because I've been over exposed to it. And they start playing it earlier and earlier with each year. I heard holiday music in one store back in August and they were setting up some of their holiday displays. Ugh.

I did not plan for a week to go by. Oiy.

  I planned to pick up the blogging threads and start weaving them again Monday. Then I had a migraine that put me out of commission. After that, I had my intake appointment for therapy. I glossed over some of the trauma because I could see that my therapist was getting deeply disturbed. I don't want to break another therapist. This one genuinely wants to help and when I broke down crying in the middle of the session, she offered me some tissues and told me to take the time I needed.

I'm worried that as I get into the deeper mess of it all, I'm going to break her. I just glossed over a lot of the trauma and her expression turned grave. I made clear there was a lot more that was a lot uglier. I don't know if I'm going to be transferred from V., who I just met, to the head of the clinic. I don't honestly know how it's going to go. Watching that woman's pained expression made me feel awful to be the cause of it. But, that was Tuesday.

Wednesday was taking the boys to their therapy appointments. The guys seem to be doing well in session and learning how to better manage their emotions. Cuddle Bear has some testosterone poisoning induced anger issues, but he's 16, that happens. (No literal poisoning, just raging hormones.) He also has some serious anxiety about a number of things. The therapy process is helping him get something of a handle on his anger and anxiety. So, it is working well for him. Snuggle Bug is anxious about everything school related and that's a long slog through that mess of feelings. And hormones are kicking in as he is entering puberty. His therapist is working really hard to help him navigate this stuff. He's having some difficulty, but I think he'll get through it.

Today, I'll be doing a video for my Veiled Witch blog. I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to talk about. My brain is a bit fuzzy and I'm tired because my CPAP and I haven't been getting along well since day one. If I can, tomorrow, I will stop as the medical supply store where I picked it up and see what other mask options my health insurance covers. Apparently with this one, I just haven't had a good seal with the mouth piece which is why it is leaking so much. I'm relieved that I haven't broken it. I was getting worried there.

And to top it all off, I have caught the cold that's been bothering everyone else in the house. My sinuses hate me, my throat is itchy, and I'm even more tired than just with the messed up sleep situation. Ugh.